Important Advice

I know the majority of you are interested in obtaining a new credit card so you can put 1% down on a Hummer3. For those of you NOT interested in obtaining a new credit card, DO NOT do the following thing:
Sign up for a new credit card using a fake middle initial, fake social security number, and fake mailing address just so that your friend can take home an additional crappy promotional item free with sign-up. Those credit card people are not to be underestimated, they are tenacious gumshoes and they will find you, no matter what kind of fake shit you put down, despite what your friend says. DO NOT listen to that bitch, ok? She doesn't know what she's talking about. I am now the miffed owner of a new credit card which I was not interested in obtaining. Without, I might add, the benefit of an aforementioned crappy promotional item, which was in this case, a cocktail shaker. The moral of this story is: Do not do nice things for greedy people--you'll end up with an unwanted credit card, and you'll have to drown your sorrows by drinking directly from the bottle, sans shaker. Consider yourself learned.