My Parents Were Awesome (Yours Were Too)

The other eve on the NBC Nightly News, Brian Williams mentioned a statistic that old people enjoy reading bad news about young people in the media versus good news because it makes them feel good about themselves and boosts their self-esteem. And young people? It turns out they're not interested in reading any news--good or bad-- about old people. Which sounds about right. Youth sells.

In that vein, my hilarious, precious pal (and Mortified alum) Eliot Glazer came up with a delightful concept and created an amazing website and new book (in stores April 2011; available for pre-order on Amazon now.) called My Parents Were Awesome: "Before the fanny packs and Andrea Bocelli concerts, your parents (and grandparents) were once free-wheeling, fashion-forward, and super awesome."

Hard to believe, but true. Now that I'm a parent, I'm aware more than ever that I'll never look younger than I do today (barring any plastic surgery down the line) and I'll most likely not be any "cooler" (clearly I'm already uncool if I'm watching network television's 6:30 p.m. newscast). If I'm lucky to live until I'm old, I'll end up looking like everyone's Mom eventually does, it's how life works. Here's a pic of Brian and Mary on My Parents Were Awesome , submitted by Katrisse:

Brian and Mary (formerly awesome) submitted by Katrisse

Do you have pictures of your parents when they were awesome? I know I do! Send 'em in to myparentswereawesome@gmail.com with your name and the name of those pictured (or submit directly through Tumblr).

And kudos to you, Eliot! I love it!

You Can Hang It Up When You Make the Times, Right?

UrbanEye

COMEDY

My So-Called Life

Published: February 10, 2010

There should be a word for it in German. The feeling you get when you hear someone read from her long lost diary about her middle school crush. Thursday night, you can revel in that unique form of humiliation at the 92YTribeca where Comedy Below Canal is presenting a heartbreak edition of "Mortified." The show is a comedic "excavation of teen angst artifacts" including journals, letters, poems, lyrics, home movies and more as shared by their original authors before total strangers. This show is hosted by Anne Altman and features Adam Wade, Jenn Wehrung, Jasmin Singer, Brooke Van Poppelen, Todd Rosenberg, Julia Wright, Boni Joi and Julianna Forlano.

By JULIE BLOOM FORWARD

NYTimes.com UrbanEye

Mortified NYC! Holiday Heartbreak on Thursday!

Mortified's Heartbreak Holiday Show is featured in The L Magazine this week, so you KNOW it's good! Valentine's Day sucks. Love stinks. Come on out and share the shame!

Thursday, February 11, 2010
9 pm
92YTribeca
$15
http://www.getmortified.com/

Mortified NYC! Heartbreak Holiday Edition One Week Away

MORTIFIED!

The Heartbreak Holiday Edition
Thursday, February 11

@ the 92YTribeca
9PM
$15
92ytribeca.org

Produced by Anne Altman and Julia Wright.

Featuring really pathetic teen crap written by the following relatively reasonable grownups:

Brooke Van Poppelen, Jenn Wehrung, Adam Wade, Todd Rosenberg, Jasmin Singer, Boni Joi and more!

WHO LIKE-LIKES MORTIFIED:
"A cultural phenomenon!" (Newsweek)
"Captivating!" (Entertainment Weekly)
"Spreading the new gospel of awkward all over the land." (Daily Candy)
"These readings capture just how wrong-headed we can be back when we were teenagers." (This American Life)
"Comic genius! (LAist.com)
"Funny and horrifying" (USA Today Pop Candy)
Mortified is a totally grassroots organization and depends on people like YOU spreading the word. Please pass this on.

Mortified: Heartbreak Holiday Angst Edition! February 11 @ 9pm

If you're alive (or dead), you've definitely had your heart stomped on once, twice or thrice. And whether or not you're lucky in love at this very moment, love stinks and you know it, so just get over yourselves.

Come on out to Mortified to hear pathetic, sad-sack, completely ridiculous, humiliating and embarrassing teen vomit from the following former teens:

Brooke Van Poppelen

Adam Wade

Jasmin Singer

Todd Rosenberg

Jenn Wehrung

and more!

Anne in Chicago ~ January, 2009


Share the shame with us!


Mortified

Produced by Anne Altman and Julia Wright

Thursday, February 11, 2010


9pm

$15 (and worth every pathetic penny)


Tribeca92Y

(Romeo and Juliet image from www.taudiobook.com)

Tonight: Mortified! On Ice! Holiday Angst Edition!

Mortified!

Tonight!

December 17, 2009

9 pm

$15

92YTribeca

200 Hudson Street

NYC

Featuring mortifying teen crap from:

Julia Wright
Anne Altman
Shawn Hollenbach
Alene Latimer
Erin Griffith
Kristina Wong
Kyle Supley
Emlyn Morinelli
Becky Ciletti

Mortified NYC! Holiday Angst on Ice! December 17 @ 92Y Tribeca!

MORTIFIED NYC

HOLIDAY ANGST ON ICE* EDITION

Thu, Dec. 17, 2009, 9:00pm

92YTribeca proudly presents Mortified, a comic excavation of teen angst artifacts (journals, letters, poems, lyrics, home movies, stories and more) as shared by their original authors before total strangers. Mortified has been hailed a "cultural phenomenon" by Newsweek and was celebrated by the likes of This American Life, The Today Show, The Onion AV Club, Esquire, Entertainment Weekly, Daily Candy and more. As the largest and longest running project of its kind, Mortified's grassroots comedy collective has spent years sifting through hundreds of otherwise forgotten notebooks on a mission to celebrate the extraordinary lives of ordinary people—all in the noble pursuit of self-degradation.Mortified is produced in NYC by Anne Altman and Julia Wright.

GET TICKETS HERE!

Date & Time: Thu, Dec 17, 2009, 9:00pm
Location: 92YTribeca, 200 Hudson Street Directions
Venue: 92YTribeca Mainstage
Code: T-MM5CM06-01

Price: $15.00

Come share the shame! Holiday style!

*Not really on ice. But super cool.

Genius Organizing: It's Genius!

My dear pal (and fellow producer of Mortified NYC ) has exceptional skills, one of which is helping folks like me organize their stuff and discard their clutter. Julia Wright has recently teamed up with Nicole at Genius Organizing and the two professional organizers are on a mission to make life less overwhelming, simple, clean, and fun for all. Are you buried under a mountain of junk you can't seem to make sense of? Call Genius and let them help you cut the crap.

Read about Genius Organizing in Time Out New York! (photograph by Diana Sonis for TONY)

and now they've got a blog, yo! www.geniusorganizing.blogspot.com

Save the Date: Mortified NYC December 17 @ 92Y Tribeca

Mortified NYC

Holiday Angst on Ice Spectacular!

Thursday, December 17, 2009
@
92Y Tribeca, NYC

Pathetic teen crap for the holidays as performed by their original authors in front of total strangers (you)! The experience is guaranteed to be comedic, cathartic, and creepily voyeuristic. Produced by Anne Altman and Julia Wright.

Come on out and share the shame a la George Bailey!

http://www.getmortified.com/

Tonight! Mortified NYC's Back to School Edition @ Le Poisson Rouge

Mortified! Live, up in your grill, with all that back-to-school teen angst you remember (and have desperately been trying to forget). So whether you need to dust off that Trapper Keeper, get your erasable pens in order, fill your lunch box, peg your jeans, or cram your Le Sportsac with Bonne Bell (and blue mascara), do what you've gotta do to come on down and share the shame with us!

Mortified!

Thursday

September 3, 2009

7 pm

Le Poisson Rouge

158 Bleecker Street

NYC

$15 

2 drink minimum (thankfully not maximum!)

WWW.GETMORTIFIED.COM

Hosted by Anne Altman

Featuring authentic mortifying teen crap from:


Brandy Barber!

Jon Friedman!

Angel Yau!

Michael Cyril Creighton!

Mindy Raf!

Andrea Crossman!

&

Tom Shillue!

2 good 2 B 4 gotten!

2getha 4eva!

B there or B square!

www.getmortified.com

Mortified NYC: Tonight!

Get Mortified

@

Le Poisson Rouge

158 Bleecker Street, NYC

7 pm

$15

Come share the shame!

One Week Until Maximum Awkward: Mortified NYC on July 16

image from the Georgetown Indy.


Original awkward teen angst material read aloud in front of strangers by its original now-adult authors who may or may not still be awkward. Come share the shame!

At Le Poisson Rouge
Thursday, July 16 @ 7 pm

Got tix? $10 tix available now! ($15 day of show)


Yours in angst,
Anne

http://www.getmortified.com/

Two Weeks Until Mortified NYC: Get Your Teen Angst On

Mortified
Thursday, July 16, 2009 ~ 7:00 pm
at Le Poisson Rouge, New York, NY
Doors open at 6:30 PM, show begins at 7:00 PM.

$10 tickets on sale now ($15 day of show)

212-505-FISH

This edition of Mortifed NYC features mortifying teen crap from

Eliot Glazer, Raquel D'Apice, Sabrina DeJesus, Mary Beth Menna, Carrie Seim and more!

Come share the shame.

Mortified: Real Words. Real People. Real Pathetic.
Hailed a "cultural phenomenon" by Newsweek and celebrated by the likes of This American Life, The Today Show, The Onion AV Club, Esquire, Entertainment Weekly, Daily Candy, and more, Mortified is a comic excavation of teen angst artifacts (journals, letters, poems, lyrics, home movies, stories, and more) as shared by their original authors before total strangers. As the largest and longest running project of its kind, our grassroots comedy collective has spent years sifting through hundreds of otherwise forgotten notebooks on a mission to celebrate the extraordinary lives of ordinary people.---all in the noble pursuit of self-degradation--so come share the shame! Mortified is produced in NYC by Anne Altman and Julia Wright.

Your Old Stuff + a Live Audience = Horrifying Comedy (Mortified)

The Anonymity Project: Sent in by Ramona. Thanks, Ramona!

Next Mortified NYC: Thursday, July 16, 2009 at Le Poisson Rouge! 7 pm
Recession-friendly ticket and drink prices! $10 advance / $15 day of show
www.getmortified.com
www.lepoissonrouge.com
Tickets on sale now.
Come share the shame!

Mortified NYC's May Show at Le Poisson Rouge

Mortified NYC at Le Poisson Rouge, NYC~ May 20, 2009

Julia Wright (Mortified NYC Producer)

Anne Altman (Mortified NYC Producer)

Ilana Glazer

Jasmin Singer

John Grady

Joan Franzino

Jake Goldman

Jenn Wehrung

Anne and Jake in LPR's green room with cast and friends

*** Fantastic snaps shot by hunk o' burnin' talent, Jason Woolfolk. ***

Mortified NYC's next show is Thursday, July 16 at 7 pm at Le Poisson Rouge. Our last show was standing room only, so reserve seats now to share the shame with us!

www.getmortified.com

Save the Date for Mortified NYC on July 16 at Le Poisson Rouge

Hailed a "cultural phenomenon" by Newsweek and celebrated for years by the likes of This American Life, The Today Show, Esquire, The Onion AV Club, Daily Candy, Entertainment Weekly, E!, Talk of the Nation and more, Mortified is a comic excavation of the strange and extraordinary things we created as kids. Witness adults sharing their own adolescent journals, letters, poems, lyrics, home movies, stories and more. The largest and longest-running project of its kind, Mortified produces comedic content for the stage, the page, and the web. Our latest book, Mortified: Love Is a Battlefield, is in stores everywhere. Mortified is produced in NYC by Anne Altman and Julia Wright.

www.getmortified.com

Summer Lovin' Edition of Mortified!
Thursday, July 16, 2009
7 pm
at Le Poisson Rouge!
www.lepoissonrouge.com
Advance reservations suggested

Get Yourself a Porkslap Tonight at Mortified

Le Poisson Rouge serves Porkslap! Enjoy a few of these delightful coldies as you laugh your bingbang off with the brave souls who are about to Mortify themselves tonight at 7 pm.

See you there!

Read Some Evil, Hear n' See Some Evil: Anne in May

Mortified! Wednesday, May 20 at 7 pm at Le Poisson Rouge!

GET MORTIFIED:
Hailed a "cultural phenomenon" by Newsweek and celebrated by the likes of This American Life, The Today Show, The Onion AV Club, Esquire, Entertainment Weekly, Daily Candy, and more, Mortified is a comic excavation of teen angst artifacts (journals, letters, poems, lyrics, home movies, stories, and more) as shared by their original authors before total strangers. As the largest and longest running project of its kind, our grassroots comedy collective has spent years sifting through hundreds of otherwise forgotten notebooks on a mission to celebrate the extraordinary lives of ordinary people.---all in the noble pursuit of self-degradation--so come share the shame! Our two books, Mortified: Real Words Real People Real Pathetic and Mortified: Love is a Battlefield are in bookstores now and make great gifts! Visit http://www.getmortifie... for more info. Share the shame. Mortified is produced in NYC by Anne Altman and Julia Wright.
Reserve seats! $10 tickets on sale now! ($15 day of show + 2 item min)
http://www.lepoissonrouge.com/

Misery Date on Friday, May 29 at 7:30 pm at Ochi's Lounge!

MISERY DATE: Online, Blind, and Simply Ridiculous Dating Stories - Are you single and frustrated? Perpetually the 3rd wheel? Sexless and the City? Anne Altman (Mortified, Two Can Anne) feels your pain because she's experienced the lion's share of terrible dates in this town: Cheap Guy, Gross Guy, Dumb Guy, Silent Guy, Militant Zionist Guy, "No Doubt About It" Guy (his favorite phrase), Creepy Vasectomy Guy, Yoga Guy, Guy Who Smelled Like a Hamper, Yellow Rubber Bracelet Guy, and she could go on. Oh, and she will--misery loves company, so she's invited some similarly disenchanted folks to share their miserable stories for a cathartic evening of laughs, pity, and a sliver of hope! Hosted by Anne Altman. Free with a cocktail! www.annealtman.blogspot.com

Family Hour with Auntie Sara on Saturday, May 30 at 9 pm Ochi's Lounge! Featuring Anne Altman!

FAMILY HOUR WITH AUNTIE SARA - The New York Post calls Family Hour one of NYC's top alt-comedy shows! The New York Press and Metromix.com also recommend our magically dysfunctional story-fest featuring comedians from Comedy Central, MTV, VH1, NBC and the movies talking about family in a manner that is not at all appropriate for actual families with actual children. Hosted by Sara Benincasa (Nerve.com, MTV News, Sirius) with Kambri Crews (The Moth, LoveDaddy.org). Free with a cocktail!

One Week Until Mortified NYC! May 20, 2009

"The Mysterious Letter" by Anne Altman, 1979

Esmerelda stole the diamonds. She had broken into Sylvia's beautiful castle and stole them. Sylvia, a very rich lady who lives there. So, Sylvia overheard a conversation between Esmerelda and her friends. From that she knew Esmerelda was coming for her gold. But Esmerelda needed her friends and they were to go there first. So Sylvia wrote a letter saying in Esmerelda's friends' handwriting, "Return the diamonds or else!" And she did. So Sylvia lived happily ever after.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sure, "The Mysterious Letter" might not be mortifying, but there's no mystery in the fact that it's a ridiculous piece of crap. For maximum angst and mega mortification come share the shame with brave folks who will bare their teen souls for an experience that is comedic, cathartic, and creepily voyeuristic:

It's Springtime for Mortified!


Wednesday, May 20, 2009


7 pm


at Le Poisson Rouge!


http://www.lepoissonrouge.com/


***Advance reservations recommended--tickets on sale now here! ***

What is Mortified?

Hailed a "cultural phenomenon" by Newsweek and celebrated by the likes of This American Life, The Today Show, The Onion AV Club, Esquire, Entertainment Weekly, Daily Candy, and more, Mortified is a comic excavation of teen angst artifacts (journals, letters, poems, lyrics, home movies, stories, and more) as shared by their original authors before total strangers. As the largest and longest running project of its kind, our grassroots comedy collective has spent years sifting through hundreds of otherwise forgotten notebooks on a mission to celebrate the extraordinary lives of ordinary people.

Mortified is produced in New York by Anne Altman and Julia Wright.

http://www.getmortified.com/


Share the shame!

Got Zits? Got Tix? Mortified NYC on May 20!

It's Springtime for Mortified!

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

7 pm

at Le Poisson Rouge!

www.lepoissonrouge.com

***Advance reservations recommended--tickets on sale now here! ***

What is Mortified?

Hailed a "cultural phenomenon" by Newsweek and celebrated by the likes of This American Life, The Today Show, The Onion AV Club, Esquire, Entertainment Weekly, Daily Candy, and more, Mortified is a comic excavation of teen angst artifacts (journals, letters, poems, lyrics, home movies, stories, and more) as shared by their original authors before total strangers. As the largest and longest running project of its kind, our grassroots comedy collective has spent years sifting through hundreds of otherwise forgotten notebooks on a mission to celebrate the extraordinary lives of ordinary people.

Mortified is produced in New York by Anne Altman and Julia Wright.

www.getmortified.com

***Day of show tickets are $15, so don't wait, appreciate!