Killer Facts About Chuck Norris

I learned about a great new site this morning called Chuck Norris Facts. For some reason the site is unavailable today, but you can view it through it's cached pages. Here's a sampling of the content. Enjoy. Enjoy it as much as you can not being Chuck Norris and all.


-When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

-Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

-There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

-Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.

-Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

-Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

-Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

-Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

-There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.

-When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.

-Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

-Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.

-There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.

-Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.

-Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

-Chuck Norris gave Mona Lisa that smile.

-Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

-Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost

-Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.

-Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.