Thursday, June 25, 2009

Ladies Restroom Cellphone Talker/Crapper Strikes Again

You may remember my last encounter with the Miss Manners Nightmare whose ideal place to have a cellphone conversation is in the women's bathroom while she's on the toilet with her pants around her ankles.

Last week, I found her in there alone flossing her teeth at one of the several sinks, also in an indiscreet disgusting manner (think noises, flicking, bits of food flying). I gave her a wide berth. As I washed my hands, she entered one of the 9 stalls, closed the door behind her and sat down on the toilet, pants around ankles. A second later her cell phone went off:

*Deeee doo doo Deee deee doo doo Deee deee doo doo Deee doo doo*

She picked up:

"Debbie? Hi! Yeah, so, blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah..."

Me: Oh hell, no.

I turned around, entered the last stall and flushed the empty toilet.

WOOOOOOSHHHHHHHHH!

Repeat x7 as I flushed every toilet in succession on my way out the door:

WOOOOOOSHHHHHHHHH!

WOOOOOOSHHHHHHHHH!

WOOOOOOSHHHHHHHHH!

WOOOOOOSHHHHHHHHH!

WOOOOOOSHHHHHHHHH!

WOOOOOOSHHHHHHHHH!

WOOOOOOSHHHHHHHHH!

A waste of water? Definitely. Necessary? Absolutely. Effective? Probably not, but Debbie needs to know that she's chatting with someone with her ass on the john and her pants on the floor.

It was fun.

2 comments:

teri said...

LMAO!!!

You go, Anne.

Micgar said...

Next time you should make horrible diarrea fart noises in the stall next to her! And then say-"Hey Debbie!" "Ugh!" "That is gross!" "Can you please give us a courtesy flush?!"
I think talking on the phone in the bathroom is nasty! Think of the germs that could get next to your mouth/nose!