All I'm Sayin' Is: Plane Crashes and Beheadin' Husbands Give Buffalo a Bad Name

The term crazy is tossed about so much that what is indeed technically, text book, clinically, court-of-law "crazy" and what the shades of grey are can be debated until the cows come home.

But the person who cuts another person's head off? 

Someone like Mr. Mo Hassan, for example, from Orchard Park, New York? Who got a little pissy doodles at his wife for filing for divorce so he cut her head off?

Well, that head-cutting off person (usually a dude: testosterone! now with 100% more rage!) is absolutely, undoubtedly, resolutely, completely, positively, honestly, totally, seriously, irreversibly, bat-shit, out of their minds, mother fuckin', cryin' out loud, goddamned, doggone, crazy.

As is the American tourist who visits the M&M store or the Olive Garden in Times Square for a reason other than needing to take an urgent, messy dump. 

Crazy people? They walk among us.

We just never know when they're going to cut our heads off.

I SAID, I'm a Wannanuther Drinkkkk!

Maria Esther Castillo had fun grabbin' a flight attendant's butt and pulling a blind person's hair on a recent flight from Puerto Rico to Chicago. So much fun that she had to be restrained with duct tape.

Christina Szele Wants to Party With You or She's Gonna Git You

Who is Christina Szele? Well, she lit up a cigarette on a recent Jet Blue flight and then caused all kinds of delightful trouble. Read the story here.

The highlights:

• Szele told investigators she doesn't remember hitting anyone because she was drunk and blamed the flight crew, saying they "served her three vodka drinks."
• The crew told investigators she was served only one drink.
• Szele also admitted to investigators that she drank two beers at home prior to leaving for the airport.
• She told the investigators she normally curses a lot and often uses the "F" word.
• Szele said if she did hit someone, "he must have hurt her because she is not a violent person."
• Whyte says Szele was yelling racial epithets to him the entire time and said, "I'm going to get you." She also threatened to kill him.

Sure, she's no Gerard Finneran, but Christina Szele definitely makes the Frequent Former Flyer All Star Club in my opinion. The show she put on just may be worth the fines. And the jail time. As soon as they un-handcuff her I'd like to shake her hand. I just hope she doesn't punch me.

You're Dead

A flight attendant is arrested for being drunk on the job. Awesome.

I'd be arrested everyday if that was my job. How does one possibly service 300 annoying, whiny, pissed off, farting, tired and frustrated cry baby assholes while hurtling above the clouds with them in a narrow airtight tube? Certainly not sober.