Friday, April 28, 2006

He Wanted To Jump in the Worst Way

My apartment has phenomenal views of the Empire State building, and it's Spring! Which means--'tis the season for Empire State Building divers--and I'd like to dedicate this post to my dear pal, newbluebaby.

Yesterday, we had another jumper who "wanted to jump in the worst way." He wore a fat suit and fat mask on his way up the elevators to hide his paraphernalia (which included the parachute and a camera to strap on his head, of course) and then pulled a Clark Kent in the bathroom by changing out of the fat suit and into the parachute before flinging himself over the railing.

But who needs a parachute when you have a fat suit?

Didn't Yukon Cornelius tell him about Bumbles? That Bumbles friggin' bounce?!

That guy is a WIMP.

But jumping off the Empire State Building in nothing but a pirate costume with nothing but a sword and swashbuckling swagger to break your fall?
That guy is a HERO.

3 comments:

newbluebaby said...

Ahhh yes! I thought of you when I read that too Anne. It seems our would be fat jumper never made it though, only to be handcuffed by the cops. So he was hanging there, in a fat suit filming himself failing. Loser. Yaarg.

anne altman said...

Seriously. All dressed up and nowhere to go. lame. Pirates are hot. Dead pirates are hotter.

Brandy For Sale. said...

I Swear To GOD- that that pirate picutre is Rozzi's fiance Tim!!!