Monday, January 22, 2007

Women Are Better Drivers Because Men Do Stupider Things

It's official, dudes: You may be better parkers, but we're better drivers. So you can put that argument up your bing bang. The study revealed some other interesting facts:

  • The highway death rate is higher for cautious 82-year-old women than for risk-taking 16- year-old boys.
  • New England is the safest region for motorists, despite all those stories about crazy Boston drivers.
  • The safest passenger is a youngster strapped in a car seat and being driven during morning rush hour.

So if you want to be bug on a windshield, your best bet--according to the study--is to be an 82-year-old woman on a motorcycle at 2 a.m. Being drunk is optional; you'll be picked off by a 22 year old dude who'll be drunk enough for the both of you. I recommend a few wine coolers. After all, it's your last ride.

3 comments:

whipcreamy said...

i'm the best damn parallel parker around this neck o the woods.

matt said...

I think that the real question is: Who's Better At Driving With Their Knees?

Just Dave said...

How many of the women were gay? The men? How many of the men had a women sitting in the passenger seat screaming at them, "You're going to fast, you idiot" or "You missed the goddamn turn, you stupid prick" until the idea of a fatal accident became attractive? This study leaves many unanswered questions.