Thursday, June 15, 2006

Get the Hair Net

There is a woman who works in my office building with hair like this:



Not that this style necessarily looked any better on Crystal Gayle, this broad is no Crystal Gayle.

Here's a quiz:

Is your hair long enough to get stuck in your butt crack?

It is?


Is your hair long enough to hit the sidewalk?

Yes?


Does your hair gross Anne out the very door of the cafeteria when she sees you in there?

It does?


If you answered yes to any of the questions, Get thee to some scissors, because your hair is too fuckin' long, it doesn't look good, it looks terrible, and it's grossing me out. Sure, society puts pressure on us ladies to have long hair, as it's supposedly the height of femininity or fertility or some other crock of shit, but this has gone too far.

Longer doesn't equal better. Unless you're part of The Long Hair Site, that is. Then you're all about it and finding a 3 1/2 foot long hair half in your mouth and half in your bowl of ice cream doesn't bother you.





10 comments:

matt said...

I like a woman who can potentially help me if I'm ever clinging off a building or a cliff's edge.

Berry said...

That top photo is the longest-ass mullet I've ever seen.

(No, no... not "ass mullet", just "long-ass mullet". Although "ass-mullett" is pretty funny in its own right.)

anne altman said...

both "ass mullets" are technically correct, because that 'do is constantly stuck in her crack.

Sharon Shiner said...

ooooh meeeeso hohhhhnny

Unknown said...

good god..that is disgusting..why do woman allow that to happen? wtf is wrong w/their personal esteem that they grow hair like that?

These are of course rhetorical questions..

Lauren K said...

Just made an appointment to have it cut, coincidentally. Thanks for the reminder.

Peter Matthes said...

You should see the web site for people with 3 and 1/2 foot long pubic hair.

Unknown said...

wheres the link peter ?

KleoPatra said...

Eyew.

Just eyew.

Unknown said...

wooo..long hair dude..