And what would make me happy right now is a little Crystal Light drink mix powder.
It turns tap water into wine.
But alas, the cupboards are bare. And I'm not going out to buy some, because I'm already in for the evening. Meaning, I'm wearing my Big Papi t-shirt, red fuzzy slippers, and no pants. Nobody's traveling anywhere for anything at this point.
Not even for Crystal Light.
Damn, if I only had the energy for pants!
13 comments:
Isn't turning 'water into wine' the job of a certain Holy Son, you fucking heathen?
A t-shirt, red fuzzy slippers and no pants?
I could bring over some Crystal Light drink mix. What's a little rain storm to keep me inside? Tubs or packets? D'agostino might be closed ... but I could break in.
i wouldn't know, ms fits! in true fucking heathen style, i ain't never read that book!
i hear He dies in the end.
did i spoil it for anyone?
that's right. sans pantaloons.
st. bernards were bred to come to the rescue, no?
pink lemonade.
Actually, the story goes that the big guy comes back to life three days after his death. Then he spends 40 days on earth with his followers and disciples. At the end of this 40-day period he ascends into heaven.
Then he invents Crystal Light drink mix.
It is a Bernese Mountain Dog, but we come to the rescue too.
I could pick up every flavor they have. Then we could sit around, sans pantaloons, and work on a Mandela Sand Painting. Tibetan monks say they are very relaxing.
Say the word and the pink lemonade is on the way.
The dude never existed.
But speaking of Crystal Light... I bought that once. Poured too much into a pitcher and it stayed in the fridge for months. It WAS almost like wine. Good for those early morning wake up drinks. Eventually it was diluted and ended up like Hi-C. I can believe I just wrote a whole paragraph on Crystal Light.
Try the Crystal Lite fruit punch. It tastes like cherry Kool-ade.
Jesus was a zombie. Think about it. He died and 3 days later rose from the grave and now he wants our souls.
Crystal Light Advice:
When you pour the powder into the pitcher, don't stand too close or you'll inhale it by accident and choke. it's like a cloud of pink anthrax.
but the tasty kind.
Same goes with Crystal Meth. You might blow up your basement, or back yard shack, as well.
is that why you have an eyepatch and no hair?
pat robertson has officially blacklisted all of you for such heathen jest.
Yes Anne. Although the no hair is from an awful keel haul incident.
what a career for a baby!
Post a Comment