Awkard Outing Forced as a Result of Poor Choice of Costume at the Halloween Party

Dr. Harry Fingerman Proctologist - SORRY SOLD OUT
Dr. Harry Fingerman Proctologist - Costume Includes: White Poly-Cotton lab coat with two pockets and the Doctor's funny name imprinted. Simply add your own rubber gloves and the look is complete. One size fits most. Machine washable. MOR - GC7208
Price: $22.95
Order Here!

You gotta love these clever novelty costumes! And you ordered yours in August, so it'd be here in time for Halloween, thinkin' "I'm gonna have the BEST costume!" And here's what probably happened. you introduced yourself as the full costume character, Dr. Harry Fingerman Proctologist, and for those who were too drunk to get the reference and just said, "Hey, Jimmy! What are you supposed to be, a doctor?" You'd were like, "Yes, but..."And you explained by snapping the rubber on your gloved fingertips and saying with an evil grin that you're not just a doctor, but the kind that has his hands up the ass all the time, which would imply that not only do you love your job because you're saving lives, but because you're saving lives and also getting to stick your hand up butt holes because you equally love that.

And it's be awkward when you blurt out "I'm a Proctologist!" for the obvious reasons, and then of course for the added reason that it's always a buzzkill to have to explain your Halloween costume and all. I know this trouble all to well. My dear friend Liz (Expert on Taco Bell and Grey's Anatomy) dressed as a Deviled Egg this Halloween and was mistook for an Abortion. That certainly drove the vibe of the evening, with Liz screaming, "It's not blood, it's paprika!" and "If I were an abortion, I would have done a better job!"

"Yeah, bitches, with plastic baby dolls and ketchup!" I'd add.

Totally unecessary.

*This shit is sold out, yo!